From My Heart to Yours

Candace Matthews

As I pondered what to contribute to the book of essays, so much crossed my mind. Should I write about my humble beginnings and the journey to where I am today? Or the joys and challenges of being an adoptive parent? Or becoming a student of world cultures from all the amazing travel with which I have been blessed? Or even my personal passions of ballroom dancing, musical theater, and baking?

I must admit, as personally rewarding all of those have been in my life, nothing has impacted me as much as the recent events that have brought years of racial and social injustice to the forefront. Despite my wonderful degree from the Stanford GSB, I have faced (and still face) biases, profiling, and inequities. With that top of mind, I thought I’d share the Facebook post that I wrote after several recent incidents (the senseless deaths of George Floyd, Ahmaud Arbery, and Breonna Taylor, as well as the disgusting encounter in Central Park between Amy Cooper and Christian Cooper) became “the straw that broke the camel’s back” for so many, including me.

My Facebook Post of 5.31.20

Where do I begin … the tragedies of this week, no well beyond this week, are becoming too much to bear. I have men in my life (husband, son, brothers, nephews, cousins and friends), who because they are African American, face unimaginable injustices, big and small, just because of the color or their skin. I have had to have the “talk” with my teenage son to prepare him for how to respond if he were met by police or confronted by just merely walking in a neighborhood where someone might think he doesn’t belong. It’s grossly unfair and exhausting.

Someone shared this video from Trevor Noah with me and now I am sharing with you. He captures the sentiment that so many African Americans like me feel in a way only Trevor Noah can. Look him up (The Daily Show on Instagram) and take a listen.

If you want to know what you can do, just CALL…

• C – Challenge racism and injustice every time you see it. Being silent is no longer an option.
• A – Actively listen to others and be part of the solution. Paying lip service isn’t enough.
• L – Learn about someone unlike yourself, their lives and experiences. Only then can you begin to understand what it feels like to be in their shoes.
• L – Love and value every life. Yes, Black Lives do Matter.

In love and peace. (End of post.)

Through it all, I vow to educate any and everyone I can, because as my mother used to say, “If they knew better, they’d do better.” I have to…It’s far too personal to me. My own grandfather – Caesar Sheffield, was lynched in 1915, after being accused of something he never did, because someone (white) wanted something my grandfather owned. His name is memorialized in the National Memorial for Peace and Justice in Montgomery Alabama.

Martin Luther King once said, “Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly.” It’s never too late to learn or teach others. If you need support, just C.A.L.L. me.